Blog Post: To Pay, or Not to Pay..

The first date is either the start of something new, or the end of something that never was. It's the day where first impressions mean everything; from the way you dress, to the conversations you make and the manners you present. But there's a specific moment at the very end of a first date that some women fear.....the bill. (Queue the scary music!)

But Why? Well.. it's mainly because now more than ever, women feel more obligated to reach inside their wallet (as slowly as possible) to see if their date stops them and says, "it's okay, I got it." Now, there are several things wrong with this, in my opinion. I personally feel that if someone asks you on a date, then why would you be the one to pay? Think about it... This doesn't make much sense and I wish more women didn't feel like they had to reach into their pockets because they felt bad. There's absolutely nothing to feel bad about if you're the one being asked out. This doesn't mean that you shouldn't offer to pay for future dates to come, but I would hold off on the first one or two. And gentlemen, please do not allow your date to pay for the bill (or the tip). Trust me when I say it's a bad move, and this is the very first detail of a date that girlfriends share with each other. This simple yet extremely crucial moment possibly paves the way for whether your date approves of you or not, and whether a second date is in your future. Also, first dates don't have to be elaborate dinners at Maestro's or Nobu. Not every girl is as high maintenance as you think, and sometimes a cute dinner at the restaurant down the street will do just fine. So relieve yourself from the loads of pressure social media places on men and the amount of money they're expected to spend on dates, it's not true.

The main point is, gentlemen - don't feel like you have to spend hundreds of dollars on a first date. Whether you decide to go somewhere fancy or not, always pay the entire bill, especially if you asked her out. This is the courteous thing to do despite your date insisting that she can pitch in. If dates are becoming too expensive, then you may want to ask yourself if now is the right time to be dating. Also, always remember that fancy dates do not lead to sex. Just because you take your date somewhere luxurious doesn't mean you're getting lucky my friend, so save yourself the excitement down there, as well as some money. Ladies - leave your wallets at home! If you're willing to pay for next time, then feel free to do so. However, never hold that guilt of feeling like you have pitch in on a first date when you've been asked out. There's nothing more uncomfortable than battling with yourself over one of the most stressful questions in dating history...

to pay? or not to pay?

-Autumn C.